The Great Divide
by I.c.E.d.C.u.P.c.A.k.E
Summary: AU - What if: Joel didn't change his mind about leaving Ellie with Tommy. That decision may change his and Ellie's lives forever. Will they be able to overcome a whole new set of obstacles? Can they heal from wounds that go too deep?
1. Chapter 1

**So folks, this is my first attempt at a Last of US fic. I hope you'll like it, and please let me know what you think. Positive or negative, I'll take whatever feedback I can get. That's the only way I'll get better. Two quick note; this fic will cover some adult themes - none will be explicit - but they will be heavily implied and openly talked about. It's rated M for a reason. This will be your only warning Also, because it squicks me out, this is NOT a Joel/Ellie fic. So, without further ado...Let's get started.**

* * *

Joel grunted as he hopped over a window sill and landed hard on the other side. He immediately ducked down, using the wall beneath the window as a shield as gunshots flew over his head. "God dammit…" Joel muttered as one bullet nicked the window and sent wood splinters shooting into the room. He reached to his holster and grabbed his revolver tightly in his hand.

Then, he crawled along the floor, keeping his head beneath the windowsill. He ducked into the kitchen of the home and then stood up along the wall. He heard two loud thumps and knew some of the hunters had come in, looking for him. His heart beat swiftly in his chest as adrenalin ran through him. Regardless, he calmed himself with decades of practice and closed his eyes. He pressed his ear against the wall and listened to them move through the apartment, searching.

The hunters broke apart from each other and one moved towards the kitchen. He crouched again and prepared himself to attack. The hunter's steps were loud and when he came into the kitchen Joel sprung, wrapping his arm around the man's neck and squeezing. The hunter grunted and struggled, but Joel's grip was strong and fierce. Soon, the struggles withered away until he fell limp on the floor.

"Hey!" The other hunter shouted and Joel cursed, having been distracted by the first one and not realized the second spotted him. The hunter raised his gun and fired off a few shots but Joel managed to duck behind the wall again and the shots were blocked by the wall.

"Shit." Joel cursed again and raised his revolver to his chest. He quickly peeked around the wall and spotted the hunter crouching poorly behind the couch in the living room. Joel raised his gun and with a sure hand, fired at the hunter and shot him in the shoulder, through his chest. He fell dead and Joel smirked a bit.

His smirk fell, however, when he heard more hunters coming from outside. "He's in there! Get him!" They shouted and Joel scowled and ran up the stairs. He ducked into one of the bedrooms and looked down the window to see five more hunters coming in to kill him.

"Man, will these guys just leave me alone?" He asked aloud to himself. He shut and locked the door, then walked and ducked behind the other side of the bed in case they came in. He needed a minute to breathe.

The hunters had been chasing him for ten miles; ever since he stumbled into their territory upon entering Billings, Montana. He'd been looking for a QZ, but instead had found another abandoned zone – it didn't surprise him. The area had been overrun by hunters and as soon as they spotted him they've been determined to kill him as if it were personal.

A loud bang pulled him from his thoughts and he listened to the hunters thoroughly search the house for him. Having taken his moment, he stood and silently moved about the bedroom. Something immediately caught his attention. Walking over to the desk he looked down and looked at the colorful images of the Savage Starlight comic.

Hesitantly he reached out and picked it up. The pages were weak, but it was whole and in good enough condition. Looking at the number he saw that it was one Ellie hadn't read yet – but that thought made his heart skip a beat and clench in pain. He didn't know why, but he rolled it up and slipped it into his backpack and then looked to the door. It was time to get out of here.

Silently he unlocked the door and peered through the crack as he opened it just an inch. Thee upstairs, and he assumed the other two were downstairs. He tightened his grip on his revolver and waited for the first hunter to come into view.

It was time to end this.

* * *

Later that night, Joel pulled himself up into an office building and quickly secured the room. He made sure the doors were locked, covered the window so he couldn't be spotted from outside, and then he hunkered down. He had found a lantern earlier that day and he lit it up. He reached into his backpack and pulled out a can of beans and popped it open. He munched on it as he rested against the wall and tried to relax.

It was hard with the silence…

When he decided to leave Ellie behind with Tommy three weeks ago he didn't suspect to miss her this much. He knew he would miss her some, of course….But he could hardly concentrate without her incessant chatter.

Slowly he set the beans aside and reached for his backpack. He pulled out the comic and looked down at it with a nostalgic smile. He ran his thick and calloused fingers over the colorful front page and then tentatively flipped it open and began reading. By the time he had finished reading the comic he could hear a low, distant whistling. A memory…

"Quiet down, Kiddo." He said in a whisper, his voice ridden with defeat. The whistling went away, but it didn't make Joel feel any better. He slapped the comic on the floor next to him and drew up his knees. He rested his forearms on his knees and leaned his head back against the wall. "It was the right thing to do. She's better off with Tommy." He told himself, still trying to convince himself after three weeks of failing to do so.

He eventually finished his small meal, laid back, and went to sleep.

As he drifted off to sleep he thought about the last time he saw Ellie – how she wouldn't even look him in the eyes….

* * *

_Three Weeks Earlier._

"_You are not my daughter. And I sure as hell ain't your dad."_

_The words were cruel, and if Joel were honest with himself…not really true. Ellie had come to mean so much to him – too much. That was why this needed to be done. That was why she needed to get away from him now, before she ended up just like everyone else that got too close to him._

_He lived a dangerous life. He was a cold man with no conscious. He had enemies and created more wherever he went. As lucky as they'd been to get this far, Tommy was going to be Ellie's best bet of getting to the lab in Colorado._

_He could see the hope fade from her eyes and the defeat settled in. She slumped and Joel felt as if he'd smacked her across the face, but he knew that if he had it would have been better than what he had said. Though she wasn't his daughter by blood, she'd become a surrogate. She hadn't replaced Sarah – no one ever could – but she had shown him that he could trust again, he could give his heart again. But it wouldn't last, nothing ever did._

_He'd be too slow on the draw, or a clicker would sneak up on them and then she'd be gone…And he couldn't do that again. He could go through that loss again. Losing Sarah nearly killed him – it did a good job of breaking him. And Tess had barely managed to pick up his shattered pieces and put some of them back together. But if he lost Ellie, if anything happened to her, there'd be nothing left._

"_We are going our separate ways." He told her firmly, in the gruffest, coldest voice he could muster because he knew she reacted to it. He knew she would feel it. He was going to say more, he had to drive it in or else Ellie – stubborn girl that she is – would just argue with him about it. But before he could, Tommy ran in and warned them of the approaching hunters._

_Joel turned and glanced out the window. "I got two coming in." He alerted and Tommy leaned against the door jam and looked down the hallway._

_Tommy said something, but Joel's focus was on Ellie. She was usually so quick to duck and get ready to fight, but now…she slumped against the dresser and looked down at the ground. It nearly broke his heart, but he couldn't think of that right now. He had to focus on what he did best. He drew his gun and took care of the hunters._

_When the house was clear he walked out onto the deck to make sure there were no more coming, but it looked clear. He stood his ground and let Tommy and Ellie walk by him. As they did he looked at her but she firmly looked ahead and walked to her horse, not sparing him a single glance. He sighed and put his gun away, and followed behind the other two._

_The ride was silent and thick with tension. As they trotted back to Tommy's town Joel thought about his choice and whether or not he should just go along with Ellie himself. But he didn't know the area. He didn't know the fireflies. He didn't know how to keep her safe. Tommy could do all of those things._

_As they reached the ledge overlooking the settlement they came to a stop and Joel wondered how he was going to say goodbye to her…How did he look at her and convince her that it was better this way. That he was doing this because he wanted her to be safe. He didn't want to get rid of her, he did before – sure – but not now…_

_Even if he could work up the guts to say any of those things, which was unlikely, Ellie didn't give him a chance. She turned to Tommy, stiffly giving Joel her back, and moved her horse closer to him. "Let's go." She said flatly, her voice not filled with its usual excitement or wonder._

_Joel just sighed and looked back to the settlement, it was clear Ellie wasn't going to say anything to him. He watched Tommy give him one last imploring look. One last chance to change his mind. One last chance to stay with Ellie. Joel tightened his grip on the reigns and turned his horse around._

_As he moved away he heard Tommy talk to Ellie, but he blocked out what his younger brother was saying. He shut his eyes tightly and felt tears begin to well up. He fought them off, he really tried to. But as his chest tightened and his eyes welled, he felt two little tears break through his defenses and trailed down his cheek to his rough beard._

* * *

He didn't know where they were going, he had made sure not to ask to prevent himself from changing his mind. He had just picked a random direction and started traveling. Every morning he woke expecting to see Ellie there, and every morning he was disappointed that she wasn't.

He thought about her whistling, her shitty puns, and her crappy comic. He thought about her foul language and her determination. He thought about her strength. He thought about how well he could count on her to watch his back…Most of all, he thought about he she wasn't there.

He thought about her every day, and every day it got harder and harder to be apart from her.

But this was for the best. This was the way things needed to be. He was a survivor, and he did whatever he had to do to survive. That was no life for a little girl – for _his_ little girl.


	2. Chapter 2

He had lost his horse upon entering Billings – the hunters stole it and were now doing whatever they wanted with it. Joel imagined that was either eating it – if they were desperate – or using it to kill even more innocent people. Whatever the case, he had to make his way on foot to Idaho Falls. It was a long trip, it would take him several weeks, but he'd get there.

As he left Billings behind he tried to force himself to leave everything else behind with it. But he didn't get very far before he walked by a movie poster and thought of Ellie. She always liked looking at these things, relics of a life she never knew - and probably never would.

He sighed and then carried on. "She's gone, Joel. It's for the best." He told himself.

Talking to himself was a habit he developed recently. It helped fill the silence.

He was about ten miles out of Billings and things were starting to become sparse. He knew he would have to stock up on supplies and then rely on the wilderness in order to make it to Idaho Falls. He had done it plenty of times before, so he wasn't worried. "Besides, now you only have to feed yourself." He said, trying to convince himself that it was a good thing.

As he left the final outlying city next to Billings he pulled out his map to make sure he was heading in the right direction. "If I follow the interstate I should hit Bozeman in a few days…" He grumbled as he pointed to the city on the map. He then looked for some decent sized cities along the way and quickly plotted a course so he could sleep indoors every night and hopefully scavenge for food along the way.

The first few days of his trek went by uneventfully. On the fourth day, only thirty miles out from Bozeman, he ran out of food and had to go hunting. He managed to shoot a large rabbit and ate well that night. On the sixth day he made it into the city and started looking for a place to bunker down so he could rest from the long walk.

Bozeman was a lot like Billings. There wasn't a QZ here, but it was another abandoned city, with cars and litter everywhere. There was the smell of death and disease that was almost everywhere throughout the states now. It looked empty, but he knew better and was on edge as he walked down the exit ramp and made his way into the city.

He wound his way through the cars and barricades and walked down the streets, making sure to stick to the sides so he wasn't in the view of anyone watching. He listened to the ambient noises of the town and looked up and down streets, trying to find a good spot to hide out as he rested. He didn't want to get into the residential area too much, because more infected tended to be in those areas. Of course, more hunters remained on the commercial streets. But he'd take his chances with the humans.

He found a few cans of food along the way and some other supplies he could put to use, but nothing of great import. Joel turned down towards a mall and several restaurants when he heard screaming. He tensed, immediately grabbed his gun and ducked into a building.

The yelling and screaming grew louder and soon he heard pounding footsteps. There were too many to hear how many people there were. A few second later he saw three young people run into the street and into a restaurant across from him. Joel looked it over and knew it wasn't a good place to hold up, there were too many entrances and just looking in he could see that there wasn't much cover.

"You idiots. You'll be sitting ducks in there." Joel commented and then watched as a dozen hunters ran into the streets. "Ah hell…" He cursed and ducked down even further so they wouldn't notice him.

"Surround them! They went in there!" One of the hunter called out to the others and Joel braced himself, waiting for the slaughter.

He could hear the three crying, giving away their position.

"_Joel, what are you doing?! Help them!" _Joel scowled and shook his head swiftly, hoping to get Ellie's voice out of his head. _"They're going to die. You can help them."_

"Quiet, Ellie!" He said in a harsh whisper and jerked his head again.

"_No! Help them!"_

"There are too many hunters." He insisted firmly. He ignored the fact that he was arguing with himself. Maybe he was finally losing his mind, but he didn't care.

"_You've fought more." _The voice insisted and Joel cringed and began hating himself a little.

"Damn." He cursed and then pulled out his rifle and pointed it over the edge of the window. With three shots in succession he offed three of the hunters. They immediately turned around and looked at him. He spun and darted deeper into the restaurant as he began reloading his rifle. He came to a stop in the kitchen and hid in an overturned refrigerator. Again he peeked his rifle over and fired three more times, but he missed on the third.

"Light him up!" A hunter called and Joel heard the tell-tale flare of fire and immediately rolled out of the way. He didn't move quite fast enough and the shattered glass hit his arm and his side burned lightly at the burst of flame.

'_Seven more.'_ Joel thought to himself as ducked and walked out the other exit of the kitchen to get a new angle on the hunters. This allowed him to look back outside and he saw there were still two over around the others he was trying to save. He would hurl his own Molotov over there, but it would probably end up hurting the innocents, rather than helping them.

Spotting an upturned table in the dining room he hid behind it, so it blocked him from the kitchen, and then used his last three bullets to take out the two hunters bothering the trio. "You're welcome." He grumbled as he heard the five hunters behind him start coming at him. He ran to the window and hurdled over it to get some distance between him and them.

As he ran he reached into his backpack and pulled out one of the molotovs he'd prepared and lit it up. He threw it behind him and was glad to hear it hit one of the hunters. He glanced back over his shoulder and saw that the splash had hit two more as well. Then, with a couple more shots of his revolver, the rest were taken care of.

The street fell into silence and Joel just sighed a bit. "Ya happy?" He asked, but for once, his imaginary Ellie was silent.

"Oh my god! You killed them all." A young man exclaimed as he and the other two emerged from the restaurant, clinging to each other. Joel slowly turned back to face them and shrugged.

"Yeah." He grumbled and then started looting the bodies. He had expected the three to move right along, but instead they hovered near him and followed him from body to body. "Can I help you?" He asked, making his annoyance clear.

"Thank you for saving us." A young woman spoke. She seemed to be the youngest of the three, probably in her mid-twenties.

"Yeah. Now, carry on. Don't let me bother you." Joel said, unsure of how he could make himself much clearer. He reloaded his guns so they'd be ready if he needed them and as he did the trio continued staring at him.

"Well is there anything we can do to thank you?" The man asked again, holding the hand of the woman who hadn't spoken yet. That was already more information than Joel needed, so he rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Yeah, you can carry on." He said, waving them on down the street, towards the mall.

"Well…What if there are more of those men?" The man asked and Joel sighed heavily and rubbed at his chin in frustration.

"Look, I don't do…whatever it is you want me to do. Ok? I work better by myself." He told them and then stood and began swiftly walking away. However, they still followed. _'God damn it…'_ He thought to himself as he came to another stop.

"We can pay you." The second girl finally spoke. "We're on our way to the QZ in Billings. We -."

"Don't bother. It ain't there." Joel said and put his hands on his hips, trying to think of something to say to make them leave him alone.

His words seemed to shock them and he couldn't imagine why. There were abandoned QZs all across the country. They weren't nearly as secure as they claimed they were. Especially with smugglers like him sneaking in and out. The fact that they were surprised made him think.

"Just where are you three from?" He asked, motioning to them weakly with one hand.

"We came from the QZ in Regina. But it was overrun by infected. They told us to come south to Billings." The man said and then shook his head. "Oh, we haven't even introduced ourselves. How rude. I'm Reed. This is my fiancé, Christine, and her sister Carly." He said, motioning to each of them respectively.

"Good fer you. Now…excuse me." Joel turned once again as he thought about their situation. They probably grew up in the QZ. While life was hard in them, they were definitely soft compared to the wilderness, especially if they didn't do anything reckless inside. These people would be completely unprepared for life outside.

"Well, can you teach us how to defend ourselves at least?" Reed asked hopefully. "There were at least ten guys out there and you just…took care of all of them. Like that!" He snapped to emphasize his point.

"You really think you could kill someone?" Joel asked intensely, letting the man look into his eyes and see the coldness, the harsh survivor within him. It took a little fire out from the man and Joel just nodded. "Didn't think so."

"Well, we can still pay you." Christine reminded and Joel shook his head.

"You ain't got anything I need." He said and dismissed them as he continued walking away.

"Well, what about company?" She asked as she quickly closed the gap between them. "How about this, you keep us safe, and we'll make sure there's food. That's fair right? You won't have to worry about finding food."

"I don't like company." Joel muttered and then looked down a street as he passed it. He saw nothing of interest so continued on.

"Oh come on, no one likes being alone all the time." Carly said and Joel slowed and turned back to look at them. Seeming to realize they crossed a line the trio came to a stop and took a step back.

Joel started walking again and this time they didn't follow. "See, Ellie? This is what happens when you help people." He grumbled as he started looking for a place to crash for the rest of the day.

He found a spot in a large apartment building. Midway through the night, however, he was wakened by poor whispers and heavy footsteps. "Oh god…" He rolled his eyes as he heard the trio outside the door to the apartment he'd picked. "Get in here before something finds you!" Joel shouted to them and quickly the door creaked open and shut as they shuffled in.

"Thank you." Reed said and Joel just shook his head and tried to go back to sleep. However, they were shifting so loudly that it made it too hard. So, he sat back up and leaned against the wall and watched the trio make elaborate beds. _'Totally impractical.'_ He thought disapprovingly.

"You know, if the hunters come back and we have to make a hasty retreat, you'll have to leave those behind." He informed as he reached for his backpack and readjusted it to use as a pillow. He laid back down and rested his hands on his chest.

"What are we supposed to do?" Reed asked and immediately Joel's eyes snapped open.

'_What are you doing?'_

'_Killing time.'_

'_Well, what am I supposed to do?'_

'_I am sure you will figure that out.'_

"Just…leave me alone."

* * *

The next morning Joel woke to the smell of cooked beans, which probably came out of his own pack. So much for providing their own food. "You know, I don't have enough to feed four mouths. Get your own food." He ordered as he rose.

"Oh don't worry, we found this in another apartment all on our own. But you're welcome to have some." Carly said smiling brightly to him.

Joel just sighed and started to acknowledge the fact that he wasn't getting rid of these people. "Look, if I told ya I knew a place where you could go and stay, would you get off my back?" He asked carefully.

"You mean another Quarantine Zone?" Carly asked hopefully.

"Somethin' like that." He leaned forward, grabbed the can of beans, and started eating.

"That would be amazing. We have no idea where to go, with Billings being out of the picture." Christina said with relief evident in her voice.

"Fine. But if you come with me, there are rules. You do what I say, when I say it. You don't ask questions – you don't hesitate. I say duck, you duck. I say run, you run like hell. Got it?" He asked, looking at each of his new wards intently. They each nodded solemnly. "Also, cut it out with the chit chat." He scowled a bit and wrinkled his brow to show his displeasure. "I don't need to know 'bout you, you don't need t'know about me."

"Surely we can know your name." Carly spot hesitantly, looking afraid that she was going to get her head bitten off.

Joel hesitated, but then decided that it would probably be necessary if he had to take them all the way back to Jackson. "Joel." He informed, and then continued on before they could say anything. "It's quite a ways to this place. We should get a move on. I move fast. Keep up." He ordered. He collected his things, and they were off.

With a bit of hope, Joel wondered if Tommy and Ellie were back yet.

* * *

**So what do you think of chapter two? Sorry it took me so long to get it out, I had finals to deal with. Anyways, thank you, those of you who took the time to leave a review! I appreciate the feedback, especially because this is my first attempt in this genre. So, let m know what you thought. Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

"Oh look! What a beautiful mural!"

"Isn't it so wonderful to see wildlife in the city?"

"I can't believe there are so many cars!"

Joel couldn't believe he hadn't killed these people. How could they be so cheerful? It was the apocalypse, there wasn't anything to be cheery about. So far, they were two weeks into their journey and he was proud of the incredible restraint he'd shown in not strangling them in their sleep. He kept pushing them to go faster and faster, because the sooner he got back to Tommy's, the sooner he'd be rid of them. And then he could carry on his own way.

The trip had been mostly uneventful. There had been some run ins with infected, but there weren't many and he fended them off. On the up side, the trio did exactly what he said, so they never got in his way. Just like he wanted it.

They were walking through Yellowstone down what used to be highway 26, and had just exited off towards the Jackson Hole Airport in an attempt to find some food and supplies. Joel was hesitant, but they were running low and it would be another two days before they reached Tommy's.

"Now, before you go inside, I want you three to wait out here and let me make sure it's clear." He ordered stiffly. "These places were turned into triage centers and safe zones, which always got overrun. It's sure to be riddled with infected." He explained and the group nodded obediently. Joel just gave a swift nod. "Good."

He crept up to the entrance of the terminal, side stepping old flyers and abandoned suitcases. Joel kept low and slipped inside the broken windows of the glass door and then looked up and down the terminal. "Alright…looks good." He whispered to himself, and then stood and walked deeper inside. It was a small airport, made mostly of wood. Because of that, it had nearly completely collapsed in some areas.

Joel worked his way to the other side where there were about ten planes rusted and parked in the back, along with a collection of medical tents. He checked the area once more and then walked out through a door and out onto the tarmac.

He heard something moving off to his left so he quickly raised his gun and turned, but there was nothing there. "Jesus…" He whispered, and then kept his attention up in order to hear anything else.

He moved throughout the triage tents and collected some cans of food, which would probably last them until they reached Tommy's. He kept searching, however, so he could stock up on some medical supplies. With four of them, he would need more in case anything happened. He was through looking at all the tents when he heard another scrambling noise. Again he spun and his eyes ran along the tarmac, but he still saw nothing.

"Where are you?" He asked to himself and kept his revolver up and ready to shoot as soon as he needed it.

Surrounding the airport was open land, and since the building itself was so small there weren't many places for infected to hide. He peeked behind a few of the planes but still saw nothing. He had never seen an infected this good at remaining unseen. He kept his strong arms up and his fingers tight against the trigger so he was ready to shoot in a moment's notice.

There was silence for a few moments so he tentatively began working his way around a plane to see if he could get into any of them and find more supplies. However, all of the doors were closed and there was no easy way to lift himself up into them, so he gave up on that idea quickly. He looked back to the terminal and decided he should get back to the others before the mysterious infected attacked.

Joel walked back swiftly, and was midway through the terminal when he heard glass crunching behind him. He spun and shot immediately. He saw a brown and tan German Sheppard dart behind a crate. "Ahh hell." He said, and walked over to it to make sure he could put the thing out of his misery in case he had shot its leg.

When he went behind the crate he expected to find a wild dog, instead, he saw the thing curled up next to his dead owner, peacefully looking up at Joel. "Well…Would you look at that." He commented and the dog quickly sat up and sniffed at Joel. Joel smiled a bit and reached out, and gently patted the dog's matted head.

"You hungry?" He asked, and reached into his pack to pull out a small wrapped bar he had found in one of the tents. "Here." He said kindly and the dog swiftly ate it, clearly ravenous.

Joel had always been a dog person, and so he hated to see this one trapped here with a dead owner. "Well, you're welcome to come along, if you want." He said then started walking out. The dog didn't move for a moment, but then Joel could hear its small paws dart along the floor after him. He smiled at it and then exited and approached the other.

"My friend's bakery burned down last night – now his business is all toast." Christina read and then the trio laughed.

Joel's good mood at finding the dog immediately fled and he scowled angrily. She read another one as he approached. "To write with a broken pencil is pointless." There was another round of laughter and Joel reached out and jerked the book out of her hands.

"Where the hell did you get that?" He snapped angrily.

"Hey! It's just a joke book. It was just lying right over there." Carly protested with a frown.

"Yeah well…Don't." Was all he could muster as he looked down at the pun book. _'Ellie…'_ He thought sadly and ran his hand over the cover.

"Hey, are you ok?" Reed asked after Joel had been silent for a moment. The older man tensed and nodded, awkwardly clearing his throat.

"Yeah. Fine. Come on, let's get back on the highway." He said and slipped the book into his backpack, right next to the comic book.

"Who's this?" Christina asked, kneeling to pet the dog who soaked up the attention.

"Found him. Now let's go."

* * *

It ended up taking them four days to finish the trip to Tommy's town. They had run into more hunters and Reed had been injured. Joel had to practically carry him the rest of the way, which slowed them down significantly. When they approached the gates Maria ran out to greet them.

"Joel! What are you doing back here?" She asked curiously as she eyed the others with him.

"They need some place to be. Away from me…" He grumbled with a frown to the group. "This one's hurt." He added, handing Reed off to several guards who came out after Maria.

"Sure, we have plenty of room…" She said hesitantly and ushered the two women into the compound. They each bore their thanks to Joel who just waved them away and looked at Maria, nervously. "You look well." She said softly and looked down at the dog. "Looks like you made a friend." She commented with a weak smile.

"He's alright." Was all Joel offered and then he nervously scratched the back of his head. "So, I better get a move on. Just came to drop them off." He said and then gave her a small nod and turned to leave.

"Wait. Don't you want to take a break and get some food?" She asked and Joel shook his head, not turning back. He was afraid that if he did he would give into his temptation to ask about Ellie and Tommy.

"I'm good." He assured her and started walking back into the woods. Joel didn't make it far. He thought about the comic and the pun book and how Ellie would enjoy them. He let out a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Hey, wait…" He said weakly, and turned. He wasn't surprised to see her still there, arms casually crossed. "Have they uhh…Has Ellie…Are they here?" He asked, praying that the hope in his voice wasn't too strong.

Maria walked over closer to him and gave him a compassionate look. "Not yet. But UEC is pretty far away; it'd take some time to get there and back." She said with a small nod.

"University of Eastern Colorado? That's where the lab is?" He asked, and Maria nodded.

"Tommy said they had a huge set up there in the science building. They shouldn't have to be there long, though. I imagine they just draw some blood, maybe a little bone marrow, and then Tommy will be getting her right back here." Maria assured confidently. Joel nodded a few times, relieved. After all, he knew Tommy was far more able to care for Ellie than he was.

"Well, when they come back…why don't you give these to Ellie. She might like 'em." Joel said nervously as he reached into his backpack and pulled out the things he had collected.

Maria took them and looked each over quickly. She then shot Joel a knowing look. "Why don't, instead, we let you give them to her." She offered and then motioned back to the settlement. "Stay. Just until they come back. Should be any day now." She commented and Joel began shaking his head, but couldn't muster up the effort to deny himself seeing Ellie. Even if it was just to apologize, and say a real goodbye.

"Alright." He agreed meekly.

* * *

Another week had come and gone and there was no sign of Tommy or Ellie. Maria had sent out a few scouts, but that all came back without seeing anything. Joel often patrolled the forest with his now constant companion, Bandit. The dog was far better company than the trio had been and he could enjoy his silence while not being completely alone. He thought Ellie might like the dog.

* * *

Two weeks now, and still nothing. At this point it had been several months since they left and Joel was beginning to get really worried; Maria was as well. The two of them tried to convince each other that everything was fine and there was no reason for them to fret.

However, as every day passed and the two failed to show, Joel felt fear building deeper and deeper inside of him. All he could think about was Ellie. Was she ok? What had happened to slow them down? Should he have gone with her instead? Should he have tried to make her understand? What if she's gone and he'll never have a chance to make it up to her?

* * *

At the third week since Joel's arrival at the settlement he decided that things needed to change. He couldn't stand to wait around any longer. He went to Maria and told her that he had come to a decision. "I'm going after them. They should have been back by now, something clearly happened."

"Let me send some guys with you." She insisted, but Joel shook his head.

"They'd only slow me down. Trust me, I can handle this. I'll find them. I'll bring them back." He vowed as he made sure to stock up on weapons and bullets. He grabbed some food, but knew he could scavenge for more on the way. "I just need a map to get me there." He requested and Maria swiftly complied with his request.

When she returned she unfolded the map of Colorado and spread it out on the table Joel was getting ready at. "The University is in a town called Sterling. It's far, Joel. Real far. We can give you a horse but it'll still take you some time to get there." She said and Joel just nodded.

"I'll worry about that." He said, and then folded up the map and stuck it in his backpack. He whistled quickly and Bandit came running to his side and ready to depart. He was quickly situated on a horse, and then he looked back down at Maria. "I'm sorry." He said sincerely. "I never should have asked him to take her…I should have stayed with her…" He spoke with genuine regret and that seemed enough to stem Maria's wrath – for now.

"Just bring them back." She ordered.

Joel nodded surely, set his eyes forward, and then took off at a gallop.


	4. Chapter 4

Joel pressed on with a single purpose. Going from Jackson to Sterling, nearly five hundred miles away, was a long trip, but he drove the horse and the dog – not to mention himself – ragged trying to get there as quickly as possible. It was obvious that there was a problem, or else they would have come back by now. He kept imagining horrible ways for Ellie to die, and luckily it made him all the more determined to find them, rather than wallow in regret and guilt. There was time for that later.

He eventually made it to the University about two weeks later, and was shocked to see it absolutely barren. "Maybe when I get to the science building…" He told himself, but he had a very bad feeling about what he was going to find there. He slowed his horse down and carefully dismounted.

"Come on." He ordered the dog, deciding he'd just have to search the campus himself. He led both of his companions through the triage and towards the steps leading up to the center of the university. He passed by several buildings on the way, but he didn't look in any of them as he was focused on finding Tommy and Ellie. He could feel something had happened and he needed to know what it was.

He moved swiftly, passing by shattered windows and crumbled walls. He walked up a large set of stairs, keeping a firm hand on the horse's reins and as he led the way. He then came to the top and frowned; each way was blocked off. Luckily, however, a quick survey of the area revealed that there was a path through a building. He moved towards it and walked down the hallway. The horse's hooves clipped on the tiled floor, echoing eerily.

Moving through the building was easy, and he encountered no obstacles or infected on the way through. Eventually, he passed through a large gate and then got back on the horse. The university was still silent. There was a light breeze the moved about the fliers and trash on the ground and emphasized the fact that Joel was alone here. Once he was all the way through he gently kicked the horse and set them at a slow trot, with Bandit following close beside him.

He moved to the center of the university after jumping over a low barrier. He then looked up and saw the science building. He stared at it for a moment, thinking about what Ellie and Tommy were doing inside. Were they hurt? Were they dead? What had happened to prevent them from going back to the settlement in Jackson?

He shook his head swiftly in order to stop the bad thoughts from taking over. He needed to focus. He picked up the pace a little bit and continued working through the university. He passed through another open gate and wondered what it would have been like for Tommy and Ellie to get through here. Clearly these gates were closed before; they must have opened them on their way through.

When he passed through the next courtyard he sighed and frowned, wondering why he hadn't seen anyone yet. No fireflies, no Ellie, no Tommy…No one. He shook his head and glanced down to Bandit. "What about you? You smell anyone?" He asked but Bandit wasn't acting as if anyone was here. It brought a frown to Joel's lips.

He continued through, crossed over more barriers and followed what he could only imagine to be Tommy's handiwork. Eventually he had to dismount and climb up on a dumpster to get to the open window, leaving them both behind. He pulled himself up with a few grunts and a little effort. When he slipped through the demolished wall he surveyed the room he was in.

Nothing.

"Damnit." He grumbled and then reached back and grabbed his revolver, holding it out just to be prepared in case anything decided to jump out and try to kill him. However, he heard no movement from within the building. It didn't make him feel any better.

"Tommy!" He called loudly, his voice echoing in the empty room and hallways. "Ellie!" He added even though it would do no good. "Damnit!" He shouted angrily and jogged out of the room, hoping to find some clue as to what happened to the two.

"Where are you?" He whispered to himself as he swiftly searched the entire floor. When he came up empty handed he went out to the stair case and went down another floor. However, as soon as he did, he stopped as he saw a trail of blood. He stopped and his heart skipped a beat. "Tommy! Ellie!" He shouted in fear as he followed the trail to the balcony, overlooking the bottom floor.

It looked like there had been some kind of scuffle; there was blood dotting the ground. However, there were no bodies. Joel decided to take that as a positive. He grabbed the bundle of wires and repelled down to the ground floor. He landed with a light grunt and then looked around intently for any sign of the two.

He walked around the small lobby, but saw nothing and felt his heart drop a little in disappointment. He scuffed his shoe against the ground and put his hands on his hips in frustration. "Damn…" He grumbled and then started leaving the building. They must have moved on when they realized there were no fireflies here. But where did they go? There were no signs of where the fireflies had moved on to. He knew they hadn't died because there were no bodies.

But that didn't help him.

He sighed, rubbed his bearded chin, and decided to move on. He'd have to find some kind of trail, but he wasn't going to get anywhere inside the science building so he was just wasting his time. "Way to go, Joel…" He muttered to himself as he started leaving the building.

He was so busy berating himself that he almost didn't notice a familiar backpack off to the side. His heart skipped a beat the instant he saw it, as he recognized it right away as Ellie's. He ran towards it and scooped it up, looking at it as if it held the answers to all his questions – even though it didn't.

"Why would she leave this behind?" He asked himself aloud to help fill the silence. He tore it open and searched the contents, but it was mostly the same as when they had parted ways. Some comics, knick knacks and whatever else Ellie deemed fit to keep with her. Nothing that would let him know what happened. But one thing was clear, Ellie wouldn't have left it behind for nothing. Something must have happened.

"No." Joel told himself as his mind started jumping to conclusions. He wouldn't assume they were dead until he saw for himself. He slowly zipped the pack back up and lowered it, letting it rest by his side as he thought about what he needed to do next.

He suddenly got an idea and ran back out the building and around to the horse and Bandit. He knelt by the dog and held the backpack out to him. "You don't happen to know how to track, do you?" He asked, hopefully. The dog, clearly not understanding his words but understanding his action, took a sniff from the pack and then sniffed around a little.

"Yes…" Joel murmured in relief, finally something was going his way. Bandit started sniffing out a trail so Joel jumped onto the horse and began following him. "Please, please find her." He whispered as he set off after the dog.

* * *

It took about an hour for Bandit to stop sniffing in circles and get a good trail. They were leaving the university campus and heading into the surrounding city. Bandit got lost a few times, but picked up the trail again and so they continued deeper and deeper into the town. It was a university town, meaning most of the business was focused around the school and there was a small suburban area around that, all holding no more than about ten thousand people.

It was completely empty, now.

Joel had grown immune to seeing the desolation of the country that used to be so full of life and activities. It no longer phased him – he might go so far as to say it never phased him. Just after the outbreak he was so upset by his loss of Sarah that he didn't really pay attention to or care about the state of the world. By the time he was able to even remotely accept Sarah's death the world had been so messed up for so long that it was normal.

Distantly he wondered what Ellie would have been like if she had grown up before the outbreak. Instead of the rash, stubborn, determined girl perhaps she would have been gentler – and cared about boys and skirts. Of course, then she wouldn't really be Ellie.

He was so lost in his musings he didn't hear the approaching footsteps or that Bandit had stopped sniffing out Ellie's trail and had instead taken a defensive stance. By the time he did notice, it was too late. Something hit the back of his head and he was out.

* * *

When Joel came to he found himself in a cage in a cold kitchen. His back ached, but it was nothing compared to the pounding in his head. He reached up and grabbed the back of his skull where the pain was centered. He groaned and tried to open his eyes, but everything was blurry and the light made the pain intensify, so he closed them again swiftly.

He groaned again and tried shifting to get into a more comfortable position. He pushed himself to sit up and then leaned back against the wall. The cold chill felt good against his back and helped dull the ache a little. He tried opening his eyes again and this time managed to keep them open. He took in his surroundings and found himself trapped.

Panic set in, but he had years of practice of keeping himself in check, so while his heart rate increased and his body got on edge, his mind remained calm and determined to get himself out of this mess. _'Damn hunters.'_ Joel thought to himself as he determinedly stood up and walked to the cage. He grabbed the chain link door and jerked at it several times, causing a loud clashing noise to echo in the tiled kitchen.

The cage didn't give. "Damnit…" He grumbled and then let go of the cage and looked around a little bit more. There was a window up above him. Though he could reach it and probably pull himself up, it was too small for him to slide through. He ran a hand through his hair and closed his eyes to take a catalogue of his situation.

That was when the door creaked open and two people came in. Joel snapped his eyes open and eyed them suspiciously. He clenched his fists and tensed his muscles, ready to attack given the slightest provocation. "What are you doing?" He demanded and the two men came to a stop outside the door of his cage.

The men glanced at each other and then focused their hard gazes on Joel.

"What'd you do with my dog?" Joel asked, worried about Bandit – the animal was oddly nice to have around.

"He's being taken care of." One of them answered with a nod.

"And the horse?" Joel asked, but he cared far less for the horse than Bandit.

"Meat is hard to come by." The other answered.

Joel figured these people must be desperate for food. Horses were good tools to have; to eat one instead of to utilize its usefulness meant they had no other choice. Joel didn't feel comfortable around desperate people. "Well I don't have anything else. You took all my stuff. Now just let me go, and I won't cause no trouble." Joel tried to reason, knowing the longer he stayed trapped the further Tommy and Ellie got. And without Bandit it would be difficult for him to find them.

"On the contrary, you do have something else to offer." The first one told him and Joel didn't like the glint in the man's eyes.

His heart skipped a beat as he realized what they meant. _'Meat is hard to come by.'_ He thought and then immediately his mind raced for options as one of the men pulled out a gun.

'_Shit. Shit. Shit.'_ Joel thought desperately as he failed to come up with an escape route. They pointed the gun into the cage and at him and he took a deep breath as he knew he had nothing. He was going to die. He shut his eyes tightly and heard the bang of the gun. He felt his body go loose and he collapsed onto the floor.

* * *

**My time is freeing up, which means you can begin to expect more updates. :) Let me know what you think?**


	5. Chapter 5

'_Holy shit! They missed!'_ Joel thought to himself as he laid on the cold tile and played dead. He couldn't believe his luck. He kept his eyes shut and tried to appear as still as possible as the cage creaked open and they went to pull his body out. That was when he sprung into action.

He kicked the shin of the one with the gun and then gripped the other and pulled him down to the ground, slamming his head against the tile and knocking him out. He then rolled onto his feet and grabbed the wrists of the first man as he struggled to point the gun at him. It went off again, but Joel had managed to point it somewhere else. He then head-butted the man and slammed him up against the wall to try and get the gun to fall.

However, the man kept a firm grip on it. They continued wrestling for the gun, and Joel was kneed in the stomach. He had the air knocked out of him, but he refused to let go of the man's hands to prevent himself from being shot. He took the man's hands and repeated slammed them up against the wall, again and again until the gun eventually fell.

Joel bent to get it, but the man kicked it away and then kicked the side of his head. Still suffering from his previous injury, Joel's head spun. He pressed a palm to the side of his face to try and keep everything still, but it didn't help. Instead he acted on instinct and pushed himself up and flung himself to the man, making him land on top of the gun.

Joel grabbed the man's shoulder and spun him around so he was on his back and Joel was straddling over him. He wrapped his hands around the man's neck and squeezed tightly. The man scrambled, desperately clawing at Joel's hands, arms and face – trying to stop the suffocation. However, the attempts slowed and then stopped altogether as the man died by his hands. It wasn't the first man Joel had killed and it wouldn't be the last.

His head stopped spinning and slowly he stood up and panted a little from the conflict. He kicked the man's body over and bent to pick up the gun. He then limped to the door of the cage and pushed it open. He turned and shut it again, putting the lock in place just in case.

He left the kitchen, moving swiftly and determined to leave this place as swiftly as possible and continue searching for Ellie and Tommy. After leaving the kitchen he heard voices approaching, so he quickly ducked and hid behind a preparation table. The voices got louder until they entered and then went back to the kitchen.

Joel cringed, knowing they'd see the bodies. Soon they started shouting and running out of the kitchen themselves. They ran just outside and spoke to some others – they must have come to investigate the gunshots. "David and James are dead!" One shouted in fear.

"It must have been that man they brought in. He's loose! What are we going to do?!" It was a woman's voice and she sounded panicked.

"Get everyone into the safe houses. Especially the girl! Make sure nothing happens to her!"

Joel's eyes widened. _'Ellie!'_ He knew in his gut they were talking about her. She was here, and she was alive! A part of him worried about the fate of his brother, but he couldn't think about that as he had to focus on getting to Ellie before they did.

The group split up and ran in different directions, clearly to warn people about him. Joel just stayed ducked down until they were gone and then he rose and took a deep, calming breath. He had to mentally prepare himself for what he was going to do. All of his things were gone and he only had one gun. He quickly checked the bullets and frowned. He then shook it off; it didn't matter how little he had, Ellie needed him. Hopefully she'd be able to tell him where Tommy was.

He left the building and found himself in a small settlement. Snow was on the ground, but it was old and brown. He could hear shouts spreading through the small town, clearly there was a lot of people here – but he didn't care. They had Ellie and he was going to find her.

It was hard to move about without being seen. It seemed like every time he would try to move out from behind his cover someone would run into the street again. But slowly he made his progress through the town. The chilled air was ominous and it seemed like everything was still. When someone came bounding out it would almost make him jump if he wasn't so determined.

The town was a maze of twists and turns, and as he didn't know where he was going, he found it difficult to make his way through. However, he caught a bit of luck when he came to a barricade and saw Bandit sitting at the entrance to the large storage container that acted as the passage between the two sides. He gave a sharp whistle, one he'd used with the dog before. The German Shepard shot his head in his direction and then stood and wagged his tail.

"Come 'ere, Boy." Joel said and the dog ran through the snow and up to him. Joel smiled a bit, glad to at least have his little companion back. The reunion was cut short, however, when a bang of a gun whizzed past him and landed hard in the ground.

Joel gripped the pistol he'd stolen and quickly raised his gaze. It took three shots, but the man fell. He knew the shots would draw attention to his location, so he quickly moved through the barricade and onto the other side, and Bandit followed on his heels.

Joel tentatively scanned the other side before stepping out of the container. When he did, a wooden plank slammed into his back and made him sprawl onto the ground. His back throbbed, but he was able to take a few seconds to push himself up as Bandit bit the leg of his attacker and distracted him.

Joel went to attack the man, but his arms were grabbed and pinned behind him. He struggled, but the man's grip was strong. Bandit was kicked off of his first attacker and whimpered. The man grabbed a gun from the back of his waist band and pointed it at Joel. Joel continued to try to struggle and kick, but it was no good.

When the gun shot, he thought it was really over this time, but instead the man fell. There was another shot and the one holding him went limp and fell as well. Joel spun, trying to find his savior, and then his eyes fell on Tommy.

Relief filled him. "What the fuck happened?!" Joel demanded angrily. However happy he was to see his brother, Ellie was still in danger.

"I'll explain later. Come on. They got her up here." Tommy said and pointed down through a side street.

Since the gun he stole was useless, Joel abandoned it and accepted the one Tommy gave him. Together, they were able to clear a path to a small town hall building. There were four guards outside, but the two were able to get rid of them easily. They approached the building carefully and listened for any movement within. When they heard nothing they entered.

"What're they doing with her?" Joel asked in a low voice.

"They caught us as we were leaving the University." Tommy explained, checking doors in hopes of finding the right one. "They…They're cannibals. They were gonna eat me. But Ellie told them she was immune and they got it in their heads that she was some sacred thing and she convinced them to let me go…That was three weeks ago. I've been trying to get back and get her, but there were too many guards for me to do it by myself." Tommy explained briskly.

Joel went to berate his little brother for leaving Ellie here alone, but the noise of more guards on the other side of the building stopped him. Immediately they ducked down again, Bandit obediently at his side.

A slew of men filled the room. They each held guns and were beginning their search for the two brothers. Joel motioned for Tommy and Bandit to remain there, and then snuck through the group, doing what he did best. One by one he took the men out. Either knocking them out or killing them if he needed. When it was clear he walked out and motioned to the two. "C'mon. She's gotta be close." He said and then they finished walking through the bottom floor.

When they came up empty they moved upstairs and started searching. They could hear more shouting from outside so they quickened their pace.

It was Joel who found her first. He tore open a door and then came to an abrupt halt when he saw her small form curled up on a bed, asleep. "Shit…" He murmured, suddenly filled with a sense of utter relief. She was right there. Alive. She was alive!

Joel strode forward and gently knelt by the side of the large bed. He touched her shoulder and shook her. "Ellie. Ellie wake up." He urged, noting that it seemed like she had lost a lot of weight. She was practically skin and bones. Concern filled him, but he put it aside for now. He could hear more shouting congregate from outside and knew that if these people were crazy enough to belief Ellie was sacred, they weren't just going to let him walk away with her.

"Baby Girl, come on. Wake up." He spoke a little louder this time.

Tommy finally walked in the room and glanced around. "We got to move." His brother warned him. Joel just rolled his eyes and nodded.

"Yeah, I know." He snapped at the man and then focused on Ellie. "Wake up." He began shaking her a bit harder now, fear beginning to fill him. Why wasn't she moving?!

And then, suddenly, a groan. A flutter of eyelashes.

Joel cupped the side of her face to help her focus in on him. "Hey, hey." He said as he could see panic begin to fill her eyes. "Come on." He urged and took her hand to help her sit up. However, the girl didn't move. At least, not very far.

Joel heard a strange clink beneath the pillow and quickly moved it. She was handcuffed to the bed.

"Joel…" Tommy said nervously, and Joel went to reprimand him again because he _knew_ they had to get moving. But when he lifted his gaze he saw Tommy holding up men's clothes. A man slept in this room. In the room where Ellie was handcuffed. To the bed.

"God…" Joel shut his eyes tightly at the implications. She'd been raped – trapped here for three weeks.

Hearing the shouts in the building caused Joel to push aside his revulsion and guilt. He could deal with his anger later, now he had to get her out of here. He took the gun and shot the cuff attached to the wooden pole of the bed. The handcuff snapped open and he pulled Ellie up. He realized she hadn't even said a word yet, but again pushed it aside.

He got her to stand up and ushered the group out of the room and down the stairs. There, however, they were immediately confronted by more of the cannibals. Joel recognized one as the man he had attacked in the kitchen, the one he had knocked out. "He's the one who killed David!" The man shouted, a large, red bump on his forehead from the injury Joel had given him.

The group came forward and Joel did the first thing that came to his mind. He grabbed Ellie and held her close and then pressed the gun against her. "I'll kill 'er!" He shouted and immediately the crowed stopped advancing.

Slowly they started backing up and left the building. "Tommy, do you have a way out of here?!" Joel demanded and luckily his brother nodded.

As Ellie was still unresponsive, Joel scooped her up in his arms and looked to his brother. Immediately Joel's mind shot back to another life. A life where he cradled his daughter just as he did now. A life where Tommy watched their back as they fled from monsters, not unlike the ones here. A life where his daughter was killed in his arms. He was determined not to let that happen again.

The people continued following them, but Tommy led them to two horses before they were too close. Apparently they wouldn't risk shooting in fear of hurting Ellie. Tommy helped Joel get Ellie onto one of the horses. Joel then got up behind her, and they galloped off, away from the horrid city.

* * *

**So, what do you think?**


	6. Chapter 6

"Let's stop here." Joel said once they were a good thirty miles from the city. The sun was about to set and there was no point going on in the dark. _'Besides, we need to have a look at Ellie.'_ He thought to himself, though he was none too pleased with idea. The girl looked far too thin, as if she hadn't eaten in the entire time she'd been there. Not to mention her skin was bruised and pale. But the worst part was the still vacant expression of her eyes. She hadn't said a word yet.

Tommy pulled up beside him and jumped down. His boots scrunched on the ground and he walked around the horse to help Ellie down, as she didn't seem capable of moving without direction. Once she was safe on the ground Joel quickly dismounted and moved her over to a tree stump. "Tommy, why don't you try to get us a fire started. I think we're far enough away from those people that it won't be a problem." He postulated and Tommy nodded, moving swiftly to do as Joel suggested.

Joel knelt down in front of Ellie and looked into her eyes. "Hey, Baby Girl." He tried, his usually hard voice soft and gentle. "Does anything hurt?" He asked, inspecting her bruise and dirt covered arms. "Do I need to wrap something up for you?" He asked as well and then pushed Bandit away as the dog started sniffing Ellie.

He stopped, though, when the girl's eyes settled on the dog and she reached out to pat his head. "You like 'im?" He asked carefully. "I call him Bandit. I found him a few weeks ago. Or maybe a few months. You know how time is. Hard to keep track." He rubbed the back of his head and tried to keep talking even though she still said nothing.

She kept petting Bandit, though, so he just let her sit there and do that as he stood and joined Tommy while his brother formed a small, triangular fire. "Is she ok?" Tommy asked and Joel gave him a flat look. "Right. Stupid question." Tommy corrected and then focused back in on his task.

Joel squatted down next to him and ducked his head in to whisper so Ellie couldn't hear. "I don't know what t'do. She ain't saying anything. It's like she isn't even there."

"Just give her time. I'm sure once she had time to accept everything that has happened she'll open up and talk. Once we get her back home…She and Maria can talk. Might help." Tommy tried to help but it didn't ease Joel's heart any. He glanced back to the girl who was pressing her forehead against Bandit's and letting the dog lick her chin.

"Yeah…maybe." Joel sighed heavily and watched Tommy use a flint and steel to light the fire. Once it was strong Joel moved Ellie over to it to help her stay warm. Soon after, she and Bandit were curled up by each other and sleeping.

Tommy and Joel munched on some foraged food and remained in silence as the atrocity of what had happened to Ellie was too overwhelming to speak.

* * *

The next morning Joel was woken sharply by a loud scream. He shot up and immediately grabbed his gun, ready for anything. His eyes were still adjusting, but he saw that there was no threat. Instead, Ellie was sitting up from where she'd passed out and was scrambling as if someone was attacking her. Tommy had reacted much like he had, but gave Joel a sad look when he saw what was going on. As for Bandit, the dog was freaking out, jumping around, unsure of what it was supposed to be doing.

"Ellie?" Joel asked, putting his gun away and stepping closer. This is the most lively he'd seen her, so he was hoping she was coming back.

Ellie turned sharply to him and her eyes narrowed. She surveyed her surroundings and then calmed. Her breathing was still hard from her rough awakening, but she seemed fully alert. "What the fuck are you doing here?" She asked angrily as she eyed Joel. "And where am I?" She added, looking around at the trees.

"We got you away from that place." Tommy said, stepping forward. Ellie looked at him and her expression softened a bit.

"Oh…" She said, suddenly looking very vulnerable. She leaned back against the tree and looked to Bandit as the dog calmed down and approached her, wagging his tail. She pet his head slowly and then leaned her head back against the tree.

Joel and Tommy glanced at each other and then each heaved a heavy sigh, feeling the awkwardness settle. "Well, we have a long way back to my place. We should get moving." Tommy said, looking between the two. Joel nodded, but kept his gaze on Ellie.

Honestly he hadn't been sure what he was supposed to expect. He was just glad that she wasn't that walking blank slate anymore. He wondered what had been the cause of that, but knew it was pointless to ask her. He could feel the anger rolling off of her in waves, and he felt it all directed at him. He supposed he could handle that. He was just glad she was here in one piece.

Ellie pushed herself up and walked passed him as if he wasn't even there. Bandit followed after her, also ignoring Joel. He looked down at the dog with a huff. "Oh what? Now you're mad at me too?" He asked with a scowl.

He rolled his eyes and threw his hands up in the air in defeat. He decided he'd best get used to it.

* * *

Saying it was awkward being around Ellie was an understatement. Understandably, she was angry at him. He'd been expecting it. But she took every chance she got to undermine him or insult him in some way. It didn't help that Tommy was determined to stay out of their issues, so he was on his own. Also, Bandit took to Ellie immediately, seemingly ignoring all that Joel had done for him.

He tried to be glad, because the girl needed a friend, but that left him with no allies whatsoever and so he had to just swallow it and accept all of her anger. And boy was there a lot of anger.

It was a testament to her fighting spirit, he supposed. After all, Ellie wouldn't be Ellie if she wasn't cursing like a sailor and stomping around as if she owned the planet. And if there was anything he learned since parting ways with the girl, it was he liked Ellie the way she was. Unfortunately, all of her negative attributes had always been directed at infected, or hunters. Now, they were all focused on him.

Somehow, miraculously, they made it back to Tommy's Town in one piece. They rode up to the gates and dismounted from the horses, handing them off to some of the workers on the gates. Then, Maria ran up and quickly pulled Tommy into her arms. "Oh I was so scared." She admitted and the two embraced for some time.

Joel watched them with a small smile, glad that his brother had someone. But then he glanced to Ellie and frowned a bit. She was looking around in the same hard glare she'd worn for the entire trek over. When Tommy and Maria broke apart they looked towards them and Joel folded his arms over his chest.

"It's good to see you well, Ellie." Maria said sincerely as she approached. Ellie's face softened a little and she cast the woman a stiff smile.

"You too." She said, then stuck her hands into her pockets and looked around a bit. "So what's going to happen to me now?" She asked and Joel wondered if she'd been wondering that the entire time.

Maria looked between Tommy and Joel for moment before settling her eyes back onto the girl. "Well, I guess that's up to you. Why don't you and I have a little talk. Come on." Maria suggested in a soft voice. She waved Ellie over and the young teen shoved past Joel, purposefully knocking his shoulder, and departed with Maria.

Joel huffed and rolled his eyes, surprised when Bandit stuck by his side. He reached down and pet the dog's head, and then immediately the dog stood and ran after Ellie. Joel rolled his eyes and looked over at his brother who was chuckling. "Not now." Joel said seriously.

Tommy subsided and cast his brother a sympathetic look. "Hey, it's not you she's angry at. You're just an easy target." He insisted, but Joel shook his head as the two girls disappeared into a home.

"She _is_ angry at me. An' she has every right t'be." Joel said softly, letting his gaze fall to the ground. "I let 'er down, Tommy." Joel let his arms fall to his side and he sighed.

Tommy put a hand on his brother's shoulder and started walking them deeper into the settlement. "So what're you going to do?" The younger man asked.

Joel shrugged as he slipped his hands into his pockets. "Dunno. Guess I'll head on out again. Ellie will be good here. Looks like finding the Fireflies is pointless anyway." He added, wondering what had happened in the science building.

"Well, not exactly pointless. We know where they are." Tommy said and Joel stopped suddenly and looked at him intently.

"You do?" He asked, his hard eyes boring into his brother. "What does Ellie want to do?"

"Well, we got jumped at the science center, we didn't exactly get a chance to talk about it." Tommy informed as they entered a mess hall.

"Well, you should look into that for her. See what she wants to do." Joel suggested as they sat and ate. Tommy looked across the table at him with an indecipherable gaze. Joel held it for a moment and then huffed and shrugged. "What?" He snapped.

"Is it wise to just leave?" Tommy asked and Joel rolled his eyes and shook his head. "I'm just saying, it didn't work so well the first time."

Joel continued shaking his head adamantly. "It ain't a good idea. She obviously doesn't want me around. It'd be best if I just do what she wanted. If I'd done that in the first place none of that ever would have happened to her." Joel insisted as he took a stubborn bite out of his food.

"Leaving isn't going to fix anything, Joel. But that's what you do. You just run away from your problems." Tommy spoke sharply and Joel scowled and glared at the younger man.

"Stay out of it." Joel insisted and Tommy scoffed a bit.

"Stay out of it?! You're the one who put me in the middle of it, Joel!" Tommy exclaimed. He then leaned forward and spoke lowly. "I care for Ellie, she's a good kid. And her life was already messed up enough with her being immune, but now she's dealing with being raped, Joel. _Raped_. Do you get that?"

"Of course I get it." Joel answered, his body wound tight. "I'm just tryin' t'do what's best for her. You know me, Tommy. You know I'm not reliable. You know I'm not good with people. What more can I do for her but aggravate her? What more can I do than just remind her that I let her down?"

"Put up more of a fucking fight for her, Joel! She's only just begun to process what's happened, and as tough as she is, this is some hard shit. So be there for her. If all she wants to do is yell at you, then let her yell. If you care about her, and I believe that you do, then be whatever she needs you to be. A punching bag, a sounding board, invisible. Just be there." Tommy grabbed his food and stood, dramatically leaving Joel sitting at the table alone.

Joel huffed and sighed, putting his elbow on the table and resting his forehead against it. He looked down at the food in front of him and suddenly felt his appetite disappear. He glanced to the door and out to the settlement. He supposed Tommy was right, he owed it to Ellie to help get her through this. Running away wasn't an option.

He sighed and shook his head. "This is gonna be fun."

* * *

**So I want to thank those of you who have left me feedback, it's so great to hear from you. Sorry that this took a little longer, I recently experienced a loss in my family and it was kind of hard to process. But, my writing muse is back. :)**

**I don't normally answer reviews, but Oyyo; you left some comments that I would like to respond to and since I can't message you I'm going to do it here.**

The reason Ellie is so out of it isn't because I'm trying to victimize her, nor is it something you should get used to. ;)

I see your point about leaving Bandit out in some parts and I'll definitely try to make sure that it doesn't happen again - I'm just glad you care so much. I always worry when introducing new characters (even animal ones) that they won't be well received.

**I appreciate everyone's reviews, but I felt these topics needed to be addressed because more of you were probably wondering these things too. So please continue to leave your thoughts and criticisms! I love it. (also this was kind of rushed because I felt so bad that I took so long, hopefully there aren't too many mistakes!)**


	7. Chapter 7

Joel didn't see Ellie again for five days. Tommy kept him updated, however. Apparently she didn't want to continue on to Salt Lake to track down the Fireflies. She was staying with Tommy and Maria, but was having nightmares every night. He struggled sticking around, every instinct he had told him to just run and get back on the road; but Tommy was right. He did run from his problems, and Ellie deserved better than that.

When he did see her again, he was on guard duty at the gate. Tommy's Town, as he'd come to call it, was generally a quiet place. People liked staying inside the safety of the gate and try to make a normal life. However, they had electricity, food, animals – they were basically a gold mine for anyone who happened to be passing by. He'd already seen a small group of hunters attempt to break in, and he'd only been there a week. But they were able to hold them back easily enough.

However, the problem was usually with people trying to get in…not trying to get out.

When he heard the fence rattle he expected to see either a hunter of infected trying to worm their way inside, but instead he saw a slim, familiar, young girl shimmying through a tight slip and getting out the other side. Making a mental note to get that thing sealed up, he quickly jogged out and followed her.

Night was descending and it wouldn't be safe for her to be out by herself – at least, that was what he told himself when he tried to justify his tailing her through the surrounding forest.

She must have been distracted, because he knew Ellie was observant, but she didn't seem to realize that he was following her. Bandit was at his heels, clearly sensing Joel's desire to stay unnoticed. The dog walked with his head low and ready to pounce at all times.

After a short time, Joel realized where Ellie was going. So, it was no surprise that he turned a bend and saw a familiar farmhouse. His heart ached as he watched her enter the house. He paused, second guessing if he should continue following her or just let her have her space. However, the sun was completely set now and he didn't want to leave her out here, alone, in the dark. He shouldered his rifle and walked calmly forward, all the while feeling his heart race in his chest.

When he got close to the house he heard a loud crash. Instantly Bandit jumped to attention and let out a few barks, looking for the threat. He hunched his shoulders and growled at nothing in particular. "Hush." Joel ordered in a whisper, but it was too late. The crashes came to a stop.

"Did you fucking follow me, Joel?!" Ellie's voice shouted out of the house.

Joel cringed and shook his head. He let out a low sigh and glared down at the dog. "See what ya did?" He asked and Bandit simply bowed his head and whimpered a little. "Yeah, that's what I thought." He grumbled and then the door flew open and Ellie stormed out.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" She asked, her brow furrowing in anger and indignation.

"I saw you slipping out and just wanted t' make sure you were alright." Joel explained, raising two placating hands up at her.

"Just leave me _alone_! Haven't you fucked up my life enough already?!" She screeched and then spun and stormed back into the house, slamming the door loudly behind her.

'_Huh…Some things will never change.'_ Joel thought to himself, remembering when Sarah had done the same.

Joel walked forward and tentatively tried the handle, surprised when it was unlocked. He opened the door slowly and quickly moved aside when Bandit darted in, sniffing and exploring the new place with interest. The crashes continued from somewhere upstairs. Joel eyed the stair case and walked up feeling as if he was walking up to his death.

This house was the place of his betrayal – he didn't want to be here. He didn't want Ellie to be here. He just wished none of this had happened. He had tried to accept the fact that he'd made a mistake and just try to correct things from there, but being here, in the same place where he had walked away from his would-be daughter, made that impossible. He walked up and saw Ellie in the bathroom, smashing up the sink, mirror and toilet with a sledgehammer.

Briefly glancing into another room he saw she had destroyed that one as well. "How long have you been coming here?" He asked over the sounds of her destruction.

"Since you and Tommy brought me back to this damn place." She grumbled as she gripped the hammer and sent it into the wall.

"Where'd you find that?" He asked curiously, grabbing Bandit as the dog went to wander a bit too close to the swing of the hammer.

"At the damn." She answered in a clipped tone. She spun and shattered the glass wall of the shower and then let the hammer fall out of her hands. She was panting from the exertion.

Joel watched silently as she leaned against the wall and slid down to the floor, letting her knees curl up to her chest. Seeming to sense it was now safe, Bandit approached and greeted her with a few licks to the face. Ellie gave him a small smile and patted his head. However, she seemed to realize Joel was standing there watching her and quickly stiffened and turned away.

"What are you thinking about when you do this?" He asked and Ellie scoff and shot him a withering glare.

"Oh, trying to psychoanalyze me?" She asked as she crossed her arms over her chest and looked forward, distantly. "What the fuck do you think I'm thinking about?" She then whispered.

Joel saw such pain and despair in her eyes that it broke his heart all over again. However, not good with dealing with his emotions, he brushed the pain aside and cleared his throat. "Well, if it were me, I'd be thinking about smashing his head in with that hammer." He commented, leaning against the door jam.

Ellie absentmindedly rubbed Bandit's head and the dog lathered up the attention. He wagged his tail as he sat next to the teen and bent his head to get scratched in just the right spot. She didn't answer him, but Joel hadn't expected her to.

Joel nervously sat down on the wooden floor just outside of the tiled bathroom and leaned forward, looking at her intently. He opened and closed his mouth a few times as he tried to speak but then failed to find the right words. Ten, eventually, he settled on, "I'm sorry, Ellie."

She just scoffed and shook her head.

"I am." Joel repeated emphatically. "I was…scared. Of you. So I thought I could just pass you onto Tommy and move on." He explained, shifting so his back was against the door jam.

"I don't give a shit about you Joel. I don't care about what you did, or thought, or felt. You know what I think about, every second of every day?" She asked, turning back and looking at him hauntingly. "I think about him. Hovering over me. Holding me down."

Joel cringed and turned away, not wanting to hear about what she had to go through. But Ellie continued anyways.

"I think about being so hungry I was shaking, but not wanting to eat because I knew that was where he put the drugs that made me do whatever he said. I think about those handcuffs, and his voice, and those _people_." Ellie suddenly slammed a fist against the floor, causing Bandit to jump, but the dog didn't run, instead he just laid down and put his head on Ellie's lap, clearly trying to calm her down.

"Ellie, I-." Joel stopped when Bandit's head snapped up and his ears stood on high alert. They both looked down at the dog as he stood and began growling. Joel stood swiftly, unshouldered his rifle, and moved swiftly to the window.

It was pitch dark outside as it was a new moon, but the scope on his rifle had night vision, so he looked through it and quickly began scanning the area. He saw a group of hunters walking directly to the house. "Shit…" He murmured, feeling a horrible wave of déjà vu. Except…now everything was different.

He glanced back to Ellie. "You got a gun?" He asked and she stood and swiftly shook her head, but pulled out her small knife. "Alright. Stay on me." He ordered and then moved to the back room where months earlier they had had their confrontation. "Bandit." He called and the dog sprinted from the stair case and darted into the room. He closed the door most of the way, but left an inch or two open so he could put his barrel through the slip. "Ok, I saw about six of them. We might be able to slip by them unnoticed." He whispered as he looked through the scope and saw a few of the hunters walk up the steps, rummaging for goods.

His plan was ruined when two began to walk straight for their door. Flashlights flipped through the halls and Joel sighed and closed his eyes, knowing he'd just have to go on the offensive. When the flashlight lit up the end of his barrel he shot down one of the hunters and immediately alerted them all to their presence.

While the second was digging for his gun Joel opened the door to let Bandit run out. The dog jumped up and bit the hunter's neck, immediately dragging him down to the floor. As he fell, Joel jumped up into the hallway and shot his head, then moved onto the next hunter.

He could hear the pounding steps of more coming up the stairs and realized he had underestimated their numbers, but he didn't worry. He'd taken on large groups before.

He was taken by surprise by a hunter jumping out at him from the bathroom and he fell to the floor. However, the hunter on top of him went limp and he heard Ellie's dagger slid in and out of the man's throat. Joel quickly recovered and snatched up his rifle.

"Joel!" Ellie called, so he quickly turned and saw a darker figure against the dark hallway. He raised up the rifle defensively and blocked a slash of a machete.

Bandit was running through their legs and tackled another hunter to the ground, making them both tumble down the stairs. Joel spent a split second worrying about the dog, but had to worry about blocking more slashes from the machete. It was hard to tell the man out in the dark and nearly impossible to see where he was going to hit next.

Ellie helped him again by getting to the side of the man and jabbing at his swinging arm. That bought Joel enough time to raise the rifle and shoot at him. The two ran to the bottom of the steps and saw Bandit biting the neck of another hunter.

Together the trio defeated the rest of the attackers. When it was over Joel looked to Ellie and saw some of her pain had disappeared. He hardly considered killing people a good means of venting her frustration, but it had clearly helped. They glanced at each other for a moment, and Ellie's hardened expression returned and she strode past him, clearly their brief bonding moment was over. She stalked out of the house and Joel saw her sit on the steps, waiting for him.

Joel looked down at Bandit and his blood covered snout. "Let's see what we can find, yeah?" He asked and then raided the bodies for some bullets and supplies, but found very little. In fact, it looked as if these hunters were at the very end of the rope. They must have been desperate for some goods. He suddenly felt that killing them had been a good idea – Tommy's Town was close, and the last thing they needed was desperate hunters.

He got a rag, wiped the blood off of Bandit's snout, and then joined Ellie outside. "C'mon, Kid." He waited for her to stand and then together they walked off the porch. Silently, the three trekked back to the settlement. Ellie didn't speak as they parted ways inside and Joel knew he had a long way to go before she trusted him again, but he would stick it out. Ellie deserved that much from him.


	8. Chapter 8

Maria was pacing outside the door when Joel walked up with Ellie. The blond woman ran forward as soon as she saw them and grabbed Ellie's shoulders, clearly frantic. "Where have you been?" She demanded. "Tommy's been out looking for you for hours."

"I'm fine." Ellie insisted, jerking out of Maria's hands and walking into the house without another word.

Joel watched her go with a frown. "It was my fault." He said, looking to Maria. "I saw her leave but didn't make her come back. Thought she could use some time to clear her head." He explained, knowing that Ellie _needed_ that time smashing up things in the farmhouse. He could only imagine what it was like being smothered by Tommy and Maria's concern. He knew he wouldn't be able to stand it.

"That isn't up to you, Joel. She isn't your responsibility." Maria said as she ran her hands through her hair. "She's staying with me and Tommy, and we're the ones who decides what she does and does not need." She insisted and Joel raised his eyebrows, taken aback by Maria's hostility.

Then, he registered what she said. "Ellie doesn't do well when you try to boss her around. She's been through Hell, that's for sure, but she's a tough girl and has a good head on her shoulders. She knows what she needs." He insisted, keeping his voice low in the dark night. The last thing he wanted was to bother any of the other families already sleeping in the houses next door – and that thought was far to normal for his comfort. _'Fuck the neighbors.' _He thought smugly. '_Things are too fucking normal here.'_ He added to himself before he found himself pushed back by a finger in his chest.

"Don't you dare tell me how to take care of this. In case you missed it, you're kind of the reason we're in this situation to begin with." She accused and Joel's eyes hardened and his body stiffened.

"That's not fair. Who knows what would have happened if I hadn't left her. It could'a been worse for all we know. But that doesn't matter because what-ifs mean shit. And I'm here now aren't I?" He asked and noticed a light coming on upstairs – clearly Ellie's room.

"Whatever. I have to radio Tommy and let him know she's back." Maria waved him off dismissively and it irritated Joel to no end. He watched her leave and glanced up at Ellie's room once more, seeing the girl peering down at him from the curtain. As soon as she realized he was looking at her, though, she ducked into the room and didn't return.

Joel sighed and patted Bandit's head. "C'mon." He murmured and walked back to the home assigned to him. It was large and tattered, but warm and had a bed. He grabbed a quick dinner out of a can and slumped on the couch. Bandit jumped up and curled next to him. Joel watched an old movie he remembered watching with Sarah before the outbreak. He passed out wondering if Ellie needed to stay here, or if she'd be better off on the road.

* * *

His concerns continued to grow as they had now been there a month and Ellie didn't look as if she was making any progress. He wasn't expecting her to be better overnight, of course, but some sign that she was starting to put all this behind her would have been nice. However, she was still just as distant, cold, and argumentative as she first was.

The only thing she seemed to respond to was Bandit. So far, the dog had been the only one to make her smile, and even then only briefly. It was hard seeing her so cut off from everyone. They were in the best situation possible for her to recover – consistent living arrangements, no threats, reliable food and water sources, and yet Joel sensed that it wasn't what she needed.

Ellie and he were kindred spirits. They operated best when things _weren't_ so reliable. When there was danger, they were the kind of people that could be relied upon. When food was scarce, they were the kind of people who could go out into the dangerous forest and hunt – even knowing something could be hunting for them too.

Instead, Ellie was stuck here, probably being constantly asked about what she was thinking, what was her nightmare about, did she want to talk about it? He wouldn't be able to stand it, even from his own brother – and Ellie wasn't even related to them. That was why Joel wasn't surprised Ellie didn't object to them going hunting together.

Ellie was one of the best shots in the settlement, so it was more effective that way anyway. It also gave her some time free from Tommy and Maria. They didn't talk beyond hello or goodbye, but it gave her time with Bandit and allowed her to free her mind a bit. Joel enjoyed it as well, just as he understood Ellie, Ellie understood him. She was still angry at him, but he was the only person in the town who could give her what she needed.

It continued that way for several weeks. Joel continued offering his silent support, until Ellie suddenly broke their silent record.

"Have you ever been surfing?"

Joel had been looking down his scope at a large buck when she asked. His eyebrows shot up on his brow because it had been so shocking – not to mention out of the blue. He slowly lowered the gun and turned to her. "Uhhh…N-No. I haven't." He said, realizing she wasn't focusing on their hunt at all, and instead was just sitting and petting Bandit.

He was briefly annoyed that she was distracting the dog who was very helpful at slowing the buck down, but brushed it aside, realizing her speaking to him was much more important. "Why?" He asked.

"I've always wanted to go surfing." She admitted with a shrug, looking at the large, green trees surrounding them. It was nearly spring, the day was warm, bright, and the sun trickled through the leaves to the forest floor. They were hiding behind a large boulder to stay out of view of the buck.

"But you don't know how to swim." Was all Joel could think to say.

She shrugged again. "I could learn. I don't know how to surf either." She pointed out, and Joel had to admit she had a point.

"Do, uhh, you want me to teach you?" He asked tentatively.

"No." She snapped swiftly.

"Maria then?" He offered and Ellie shook her head.

"No. Not her." She murmured, and then turned and her eyes got distant. Joel figured that meant she was done talking, but he knew the short conversation meant there was a lot going on in her head; he needed to know what it was.

"How is it? Staying with them." He asked and Ellie rolled her eyes a bit and suddenly snatched up her bow and turned stood to lean over the rock. "Ellie-."

"I never should have said anything." She cut him off and knocked an arrow into her bow. She set it loose and caught a large rabbit in the neck. It fell limp immediately and Bandit darted off without an order and snatched the thing up. Unfortunately, that sent the buck darting off into the trees; he wondered if Ellie did it on purpose.

He strapped his rifle over his shoulder and then grabbed the rabbit from bandit's mouth as the dog presented it gleefully. He took the arrow out of its neck and saw the shaft was still good, so he handed it back to Ellie and she put it back in the quiver. He placed the rabbit in the bag they brought with them and joined it with the other she had killed earlier.

Joel lamented not catching that buck, but still considered the trip a success.

* * *

It happened again a few days later when they left hunting once more. They were utterly silent, hadn't even said a word to each other in greeting, when Ellie spoke out of the blue. "Have you ever been to California?"

Realizing this was an extension of their previous conversation, Joel nodded. "Yeah, a few times before the outbreak. Once afterwards. I took Sarah there once." He explained, smiling nostalgically. It amazed him that he could think of his daughter without feeling like he was falling apart. "We went to Disneyland." He explained and Ellie gave him an odd look, when he realized she probably had no idea what that was.

"It's this amusement park. It's kind of like a small city. It's umm…Well it used to be this big thing for kids. Had rides and characters from movies." He tried to explain but by the blank look on his face knew she didn't get it. Just another thing the outbreak had destroyed. She'd probably never even heard of Mickey Mouse before. "Anyway, she really wanted to go. So I picked up an extra job and took her for her birthday. She was ten." He added distantly, smiling as he thought about the trip.

Ellie was silent for a moment, eying him intently as if she was looking for something. She opened her mouth and then shut it quickly. Whatever it was she was going to say, she clearly thought better of it and instead turned and walked away. Joel watched her take a few steps and then turned to follow, before realizing he hadn't heard anything from Bandit in a while.

He glanced around the area around them and saw the dog playfully snapping at dandelion wisps as they blew in the wind. He smiled a bit, then gave a hard whistle and the dog quickly came to his hell and the two followed Ellie's lead deeper into the forest.

* * *

It was yet another week before Ellie spoke again. Now it was well into spring and the weather was warm, but not hot, and new flowers were blooming through the settlement and surrounding forest. The trio were taking a break from a poor hunting morning, as they hadn't caught anything yet, and munching on some dried fruit they had brought with them from Tommy's Town before they left.

"Is it far?"

Joel didn't need to ask her what she was talking about. He nodded simply. "We're near the middle of the country. It's about as far to California as Boston is to here." He explained as he popped another piece of fruit in his mouth.

"Oh…" She sounded disappointed.

"And there's a desert between here and there." He added and then chuckled a bit.

"Oh…" She murmured lowly, letting her head fall a bit. Joel eyed her, then shrugged and stood.

"C'mon, Kid. Let's see if we can't find anything." He tried and Ellie stood and finished off the last few pieces of fruit before following him deeper into the forest.

* * *

Three days later Joel woke to pounding on his door and Bandit barking incessantly. "Hush! It's nothing." Joel ordered, and the dog obediently stopped barking, if he didn't know when to be quiet when ordered he'd be no good on hunts. Joel stood slowly and rubbed his bearded face, trying to wipe the sleep away.

He walked down the steps, Bandit on his heels, and slowly opened the door. The sun was barely rising but there was enough light in the dusky morning to clearly see a frantic Maria and Tommy standing at his door. He sighed and closed his eyes. He didn't even need to ask what had happened. He already knew.

"How long has she been gone?" He asked, his deep voice cracking a bit as he was still waking.

"The last time we saw her was yesterday. We thought she was with you." Tommy explained and Joel sighed and bowed his head a bit.

"I know where she went. Get me a horse. I'll find her." He promised and then turned back inside and started walking up the steps. Maria left to get a horse, but Tommy followed him up.

"Maybe one of us should go get her."

"No. It needs to be me. You two would just-." He cut himself off, not wanting to sound inconsiderate to all Tommy and Maria had done for Ellie; they didn't know it wasn't what she needed.

"Just what?" Tommy asked defensively.

"Forget it. She's going to California. I'm going to take her there." Joel explained as he collected all of his things, as well as some cans of food.

Tommy's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. "You're what?! That is a horrible idea. She's still having nightmares several times a week and she barely talks to anyone. The last thing she needs is to travel across the country."

"She knows what she needs, Tommy." Joel struggled to keep his voice even, but managed to do so. He was proud of himself. "What she doesn't need is you and your wife breathing down her neck."

"Well at least we care about her." Tommy crossed his arms over his chest.

"So do I!" Joel huffed and tensed, ready to fight, but then rolled his lips into his mouth and stepped back, shaking his head. "I know her. She and I…We're not like normal people. We're survivors, Tommy. Staying here, it ain't good for her. She's just wallowing in what that man did to her. On the road she'll be able to clear her head, focus on something else - a goal. She knows that, that's why she left."

Tommy looked at him for a moment and then let his arms fall to his side. "You may be right." Tommy murmured and Joel shrugged.

"It's been known to happen occasionally." He said, grabbing his rifle and handgun before walking out of the home. Maria was walking up with a horse and he set his things on its back, Bandit stood nearby, ready to go. He hugged Tommy goodbye, knowing it could be a long time before he saw him again. Tommy held onto him tightly and then stepped back.

"Good luck." He said, understanding in his eyes. Joel nodded and without any tearful farewells urged the horse on with his dog trotting next to him.

Maria bit her lip and looked up at Tommy. "They're not coming back, are they?" She asked and Tommy shook his head.

"But I think that's a good thing."


	9. Chapter 9

When Joel had said he knew where Ellie was going, he meant in general, but he knew actually finding her was going to be much more difficult. Now, if it had been him, he would have went straight for the border between Wyoming and Idaho. Idaho Falls was only twenty miles away from where they were, and it was once a quarantine zone, would no doubt have a lot of suplies, and maybe even a car. A major interstate went down from there and could be followed all the way to southern California. It was quick, efficient, and had the most likely probability of success. However, he wasn't the one out there, Ellie was, and it was doubtful she knew all of those things - especially as she had left in a hurry.

As such, he decided to widen his search before going straight to Idaho Falls. He had given Bandit a bit of clothes Ellie had left behind, but the dog had had no luck finding her scent. Joel searched the surrounding area for two days before finally arriving in Idaho Falls. He was frustrated, angry, and ready to give the girl a hard slap on the head when he found her - but knew he wouldn't. He'd be far too relieved to see her in one piece.

_'Damn girl is going to be the death of me.'_ He thought to himself with a scowl as he approached the city and then came to a sudden stop. The quarantine zone was still active. Guards stood outside, Automatic rifles in hand and patroling the outside walls of the zone. "Shit..." He murmured, glancing down to Bandit. "This is the last thing we need." He murmured, but the dog just wagged its tail, happily.

He hated QZs. They just reminded him of Tess and hard times and too many bad memories. However, Ellie was probably in there. He dismounted before approaching, knowing he was going to have to talk his way inside as he had long since lost any papers he once had in Boston. "Stay on my heel." He ordered in a firm voice to Bandit, who heard the commanding, serious tone of Joel's gravely voice and obediently heeded the order. The german shephard trod right next to Joel's legs as the man approached the guards.

When they raised up their guns defensively Joel immediately came to a stop and raised up his hands, the reins of the horse in one hand to prevent it from fleeing. "What's your business?" One of the men shouted, stepping a few steps closer to Joel with his gun still poised at Joel's chest.

"I'm lookin' for -." He hesitated for a split second. "-my kid. Short, red hair, ponytail. Probably had a pissy attitude. She come through here?" Joel asked, trying to keep his voice as conversational as possible.

"Show me your papers." The guard said, not responding to Joel's question - the man was hardly surprised. He did, however, lower his gun.

Joel lowered his hands and scowled. "Uhhh...yeah. Don't have any." He murmured with an awkward chuckle. He scratched the back of his neck to appear helpless and then shrugged. "We were attacked by some clickers and had to leave most of our stuff behind." He explained with a small smile. That, apparently, was the worse thing he could have said, as the guns were mediately raised again and the guards were on edge, inching closer to him.

Bandit noticed the raised tension, and hunched his shoulders, ready to defend Joel. The man noticed this and nudged him slighlty with his foot, hoping he could still talk his way out of this. He didn't want to have to kill these men; not something that usually bothered him. However, he'd be facing an entire city, not just a small group. Even he knew his limits.

He held up his arms again and bowed his head a bit. "Search me. I haven't been bitten." He pleaded, holding out his arms to emphasize his point. "Please. She's my daughter." He fibbed. "I'm just tryin' to find her." He finished and the lead guard kept his gun poised at Joel for a moment, before lowering it and stepping forward. The others kept their rifles raised as the lead guard searched Joel for any bites. Coming up empty he motioned for the others to lower their weapons.

"C'mon." The guard said, walking behind Joel as he was escorted into the city. Joel felt a huge wave of relief fill him as he knew he was one step closer to finding Ellie. She could still be here, or they might know where she went. However, one small worry began niggling in the back of his head - if they had searched her, they would have found the bite. They probably would have shot her on the spot; they wouldn't have given her a chance to explain her unique condition, and probably wouldn't have believed her even if they did. No, he just had to hope that they didn't search her.

He was walked inside, through slums of buildings, crumbling and decrepit. People milled about, looking forlorn and defeated. It was depressing. There didn't seem to be any color in the QZ - or any QZ for that matter. He thought back to Boston and how monotone everything had seemed - just a sad mixture of brown and gray. Outside the greens of the forest were vibrant, the sun shined brightly on wildflowers and made the nature come alive. He wanted to get out of this place as quickly as possible.

He was led to the administrative building, and as he went he occasionally asked about Ellie, but the guards just ignored him. He wondered if there was a chance she didn't end up here at all. She was memorable, but it didn't seem as if they knew anything about her. He wasn't going to jump to conclusions, however, so let them lead him into the building. He was asked to leave the horse and Bandit behind, so he tied up the reins and then knelt down and patted Bandit affectionately. "Be good. Stay here." Joel ordered and pressed a kiss onto Bandit's head before ruffling his fur and standing up.

He was taken to a room where he sat down on a cold metal chair and sighed. The guards who had led him here left him alone in the room. Joel tapped his booted foot on the floor, listening to the low thumps echo in the room as he waited, all the while knowing Ellie could be getting further and further ahead of him. He was left there for an hour before he heard movement outside the door, and then a metal screech of the door opening. He raised his serious gaze and let it settle on the tall, blond haired woman who walked in. She was wearing military clothes, and looked like she had a stick up her ass. Joel naturally leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest, ready to assert his own authority even as she sat across from him, prim and proper - something unique in the grundgy, messed up, post-apocalyptic world.

"You are Ellie's father?" She asked, lacing her fingers togeher and placing them on the table as she looked at him with sharp blue eyes.

"Yes." He answered without hesitation. He gave a firm nod of his head to emphasize his assuredy. "And I want to know where she is. She's my kid, you have no right to keep her from me." He insisted, clenching his fists and wondering just what the fuck was going on here.

"Oh, we wouldn't dare." She spoke, but the cold smile on her face said otherwise. Joel's stomach began to twist as he his nerves rose. Something was going on here and he wanted to know what it was. "We just have a few questions." She said and then held out her hand. "Oh, I'm Clarissa Maine, I'm the city manager." She said, and Joel waited a moment before reaching out and taking it.

"Joel." He answered sharply, offering no more. "What do you want to know?" He asked, raising an eyebrow as he pulled his hand back and gripped the jeans over his knees as his body began itching to move, as it always did as he felt something was about to happen.

Clarissa looked at him through cunning blue eyes. "How long ago was she bitten?" She asked and Joel's expression immediately fell and his heart skipped a few beats in panic.

_'Calm down. She wouldn't be asking any of this if Ellie was dead.'_ He told himself as he recovered his expression. In an instant his mind raced through a variety of answers, none of them honest. Should he tell her it had happened during the clicker attack he had made up? Should he tell her it had happened weeks ago? What did this woman want? Why did she want Ellie and what was she willing to do to get it? What was he supposed to say to get out of here?

"It was a few weeks ago." Joel answered, watching the revelation fill Clarissa's eyes.

"I knew it. I knew it would only be a matter of time." She murmured, standing and running a hand through her bobbed hair. "Finally...We can finish this."

Joel watched her intently, pretending not to care about any of her mutterings, but every word set him more on edge. He thought back to the lunatics who took Ellie before and wondered if they weren't ants compared to this woman, who had trained military forces behind her. He could be paranoid, but his instincts had never failed him before. "So when can I see her?" He asked, clearing his throat nervously, all part of his act.

"We've been monitoring since she arrived a few days ago. We didn't see the bite until this morning. At first we were alarmed, of course, but then we realized that she should have turned already. But lo and behold, she is perfectly sane. Having been bitten a few weeks ago...that's amazing! we'll have to run some tests of course. Afterwards, I see no reason why you can't visit her, with supervision of course." Clarissa spoke smoothly as any woman in power would. As soon as she finished, though, Joel stood so swiftly his chair fell backwards behind him.

Clarissa didn't look intimidated. Instead, she just smirked at him a bit and gave a knock on the door. Immediately three guards filed in and all pointed their rifles at Joel. "Are you going to be a problem, Joel?" She asked, with a raised eyebrow. "If you are going to be a problem, then I don't think I can let you see Ellie." She said and raised her hand, just waiting for an excused to kill him.

Joel eyed the guards and clenched his hands into fists by his side, but knew if he was going to get him and Ellie out of here he would have to make Clarissa underestimate him. He let his shoulders slump and he went weak. "Of course not. I just want to make sure she is ok." He said, looking down at the floor.

Clarissa 'hmed' and eyed him, motioning for the guards to lower their guns. "Of course you do. As any parent would for their...child." She said in such a tone that let Joel know she didn't believe Ellie was actually his daughter. Joel let his gaze settle on her once more and then watched her leave. "Give him back his things and take him to the hostel." She ordered before confidently marching out of the door. Joel watched her go, already calculating how to get Ellie and get out of here. It seemed like trouble followed them wherever they went, but he was ready for this. He'd spent 20 years doing whatever it took to survive, honing skills he never knew he had before to become a survivor, a warrior. And now he could use those skills for something worthwhile - the future of humanity. He had to keep Ellie out of the hands of people like Clarissa, or those crazies back in Colorado.

He finally had a purpose again.

* * *

He wasn't given back the horse, but was told he was being housed with the three others the city had. He assumed one of those was Ellie's. He was allowed to bring Bandit with him, and the two were taken to the hostel, where they were given a room. Joel didn't miss the sound of the door being locked from the outside. He also didn't miss that all of his guns were missing - but he didn't fret about that. He was resourceful. - he'd find a way to get more; they'd probably even be better.

No, he wasn't worried. For now, he'd let Clarissa think she was in control. Then, when the time was right, he'd get Ellie and they'd get the hell out of Dodge. He sat down on the bed and pet Bandit softly as the dog jumped up and laid down next to him. Joel kicked off his boots and laid back on the bed, lacing his fingers together and placing them behind his head. "Hold on, Baby Girl. I'll take care of it." He promised in a low voice. He'd take care of it, because that was what he did, that was what the last 20 years prepared him for.

* * *

**So, this is probably riddled with mistakes, and I'm sorry for that, but I wrote this entire thing out on my phone because my computer died. So, be appreciative, this took a lot of work to get together for you guys. And please let me know what you think, we've met our real villain finally. I would like to hear from you. **


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